PFOX Parents and Friends of Ex-Gays & Gays

Ex-Gays Face Double Discrimination

By John Terneus
The Oklahoman newspaper
May 18, 1998


For years the media pronounced 10 percent of the population homosexual-lesbian. Then reliable studies found perhaps 3 percent practicing "gays."

Twice as many are ex-gays! And research discovered reasons ex-gays turned heterosexual:

Resolving trauma of incest, rape and/or seduction.

Outgrowing adolescent rebellion.

Higher income than average heterosexuals ($55,430 vs. $24,284 in 1994) no longer compensates for reduced life expectancy (45 vs. 75 years).

Freedom from responsibilities were no longer worth being deprived of intimacy with a spouse and parental satisfactions.

Being a martyr for the sexual revolution was no longer sufficient compensation for the sorrows of associating with short-lived friends.

The fame of having politically correct allies isn't enough to put up with the suffering of repeated illnesses, some lethal.

After being told "sexual orientation" is innate, irresistible and irreversible, discovering there are more live ex-gays than practicing ones.

Practicing gays get attention. Why don't twice as many ex-gays get at least as much? Gays complain about discrimination (employment, housing, medical care, etc.). But when a gay marries an opposite sex partner and has children, the ex-gay is ostracized by former friends. Ex-gays find heterosexuals also reject them if their past is known. "Once gay, always gay" is assumed. While gays come out of the "closet," ex-gays stay in theirs. While gays gain sympathy as victims, ex-gays catch flack from all. Who can blame ex-gays for avoiding publicity?

If fairness and justice were truly sought, ex-gays would deserve the most consideration. Not only because there are twice as many, but because they are doubly discriminated against.